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Recall the negative as well as the positive parts of your own drug history. When parents, particularly baby boomer parents,
speak about their drug history, they often imbue it with a sense of nostalgia for "those fun and free times." It is just human
to forget the painful moments and to remember a general feeling of youthful energy instead. But, if we choose to share our drug
history with our children, we have a responsibility to reach beyond the general. Do some personal excavation work to piece together
those drug-using years. Why did you or your husband finally stop using? Some users (or their relatives and friends) suffered genuine
side effects of paranoia, or experienced hallucinations that were very unpleasant and had long lasting consequences. If you think
back to your drug using days, it is likely that you will remember "being in a haze" for a period of several years. Or you might
have remained in a lower level job while peers were moving beyond you. Or your relationships with friends and family might have
been impaired by your use. The Alcoholics Anonymous groups teach that if you are using a substance, then your primary relationship
is to that substance, rather than to yourself, your loved ones, your work or your dreams. What would you have done differently and
what do you want for him? |